Imagine being Bang Energy's lawyer

Chapter 6 of the special Fingers miniseries on the most chaotic rise-and-fall tale the modern beverage business has yet seen

Editor’s note: The boozeletter’s regular programming is on a honeymoon hiatus. While I’m gone, I’ve created a special miniseries from my (lightly edited) contemporaneous coverage of Bang Energy’s incredible rise and fall earlier this decade for the reading pleasure of paying Friends and Fingers old and new. Please buy a subscription to read The Ballad of Bang Energy in its entirety, if you haven’t yet. We’ll return to regular programming in early October!—Dave.

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Chapter 6: Imagine being Bang Energy's lawyer

Originally published January 2023 | Read previous chapters at Fingers.email

I’m going to throw some words at you and at you and I want you to guess what they mean. OK? Here goes:

• Bang Energy

• “Beverly Hills of the South”

• $83 million

• Flo Rida

• PepsiCo

• IPO

• Revision

• Celsius

Alright, that’s all of ‘em. Now it’s your turn. What does this collection of words mean to you? There are no wrong answers! But the right answer is *takes enormous deep breath*: