Owoc to remember

Bang Energy's board just ousted embattled CEO Jack Owoc as the company heads for the auction block

If you’re reading this, you already know. Maybe? If not: just before midnight last night, the parent company of Bang Energy issued a brief press release announcing the appointment of a new interim chief executive. As a result (emphasis mine):

Founder, Chief Executive Officer (CEO) & Chief Science Officer (CSO), and Chairman John H. Owoc (“Jack”) will no longer serve in his role as CEO & CSO or as a member of the Board of Directors.

What?

No. Can they… no. They wouldn’t. They couldn’t! They… did?

They did indeed, dear reader. Enter a black mark on your calendar for this day March 10th, 2023, for this was our first day without Jack Owoc. I mean, sort of. He’s still alive, as far as I know. But the board of directors at Vital Pharmaceuticals (which is not a pharmaceuticals company) has indeed ousted South Florida’s swolest grandpa from the firm he founded 30 ago, and isn’t that a fate worse than death for @BangEnergy.CEO, really? If you think about it?

Think about this: Neon Jack is Bang Energy. Where does the brand—which racked up over half a billion dollars worth of damages and fees last year by dumping one-time distribution partner PepsiCo and losing a pair of major lawsuits against taurine-green forever foe Monster Energy Corporation—go from here? (Besides bankruptcy court, I mean: it’s already there, and it’s reportedly headed to the auction block shortly thereafter.) But like… where does it go in the abstract, you know? I certainly don’t, but I do know Bang Energy, and the beverage industry at large, will be a lot less fun to cover without Owoc Obama screaming himself hoarse on Instagram livestreams and making unfounded allegations about competitors in ill-advised lawsuits. What are we going to do, go back to writing about fucking case-equivalents and regulatory updates and innovation pipelines like absolute schmucks?!

Not today, we’re not. Today at Fingers, we’re going to take Owoc on the wild side and look back at our best coverage of Jack. But before we do that, I wanted to float a quick, half-baked conspiracy theory that came in this morning via The FingersTip™️ Line, just to get the juices flowing: