"Our consumer landscape remains dynamic"

What you philistines may not understand about running a publicly traded beverage-alcohol company is you can never, ever just say what you fucking mean. But now that you rubes understand this core tenet of corporate communications, I think you’ll agree that incoming Constellation Brands chief executive Nick Fink has a bright career ahead of him as he takes over from soon-to-be-former head honcho Bill Newlands, a Buzzwords of The Week first-ballot Hall of Famer if there ever was one. Here’s our man Fink to analysts this past Thursday, as reported by Brewbound:

A “dynamic” “landscape,” you say? What is this, Introduction to Art History? Did I miss the recent stretch during when things were static in the beer business? Certainly not in my lifetime, and at 51, Fink was born the year after Miller Lite hit the market like a freight train. No portrait of stability, that. Is this dynamism of which he speaketh good or bad? Depends on whose ear is there to hear it. And that’s the beauty of painting with such a broad brush. You hayseeds simply can’t appreciate it.

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