For the first time in Fingers’ history, our Buzzwords of The Week this week are actually in the form of an illustration. Specifically, this vertigo-inducing vortex from page 17 of Republic National Distributing Company’s main Chapter 11 bankruptcy filing:
As Bluesky user @boozepoodle put it, “This is a madness rune for LinkedIn.” And boy, is it. Much like the sun itself, you shouldn’t stare directly at it, so instead, I’ve transcribed the copy from this flywhy-wheel chart into the business-brain beat poetry below:
Supplier Lifecycle
Plan
Performance Management
Partnership
Customer Lifecycle
Learn
Buy
Use
Services
Marketing
Sales
Pricing
RNDC
Absolutely harrowing stuff. Gaze too long into the RNDC Scaleability Vortex™️ and the RNDC Scaleability Vortex™️ will gaze into you. With charts like these, it’s truly a mystery how this company wound up bankrupt.
If you see beverage-alcohol corporatespeak in the wild that deserves to be the next Fingers Buzzword, submit it for consideration to [email protected]. All submissions anonymous!
🤝 Consider upgrading to a paid subscription!
Buzzwords of The Week is free, but most of Fingers’ award-winning independent journalism about drinking in America is not. For the full experience, become a Friend of Fingers today:
Fingers is 100% reader-supported and AI-free. Your paid subscription directly funds more coverage and commentary like this. Hope to see you on the other side of the paywall!—Dave.
